Funny Signs

Full Text: FLUSH - This is not show & tell. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Drunk Advice: Next time your wife is angry, drape a towel over her shoulders like a cape and say, "Now you're super angry." She will laugh and calm down immediately. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges...

Full Text: Driving down the road and saw my ex. Funny how "I'd hit that" changes meaning over time. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Don't try to explain yourself to idiots. You're not the fuckface whisperer. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Debating if I'm going to let it slide or start something. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Can you imagine how hot I'd be if I ate right and took care of my body? I'm not gonna do it, but can you imagine? Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Calm your tit. Just one tit. Leave the other crazy & out of control. That's your party tit. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: By far, the dumbest thing I ever did as a kid was to wish I was an adult. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: As you age, it's crazy how fast bird-watching creeps up on you. You spend most of your life being 100% indifferent to birds, then one day you're like, "Dang, is that a yellow-rumped warbler?" Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from...

Full Text: Anyone who has time to clean is not reading enough. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: If this weather sends any more mixed signals, I might try dating it. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. Features: Size: 3.5x10 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Remember! Only you can go fuck your self Features: Size: 9x12 inches Made from solid knotty pine Beveled edges Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Old Is Gold (or so I'm told) a Poem About Aging. I cannot see, I cannot pee, I'm scared by new technology. I cannot chew, I cannot screw. For crying out loud, what can I do? My memory shrinks, my hearing stinks, I don't much care what anyone...

Full Text: Know Your Shits: Bullshit - Not true. Horseshit - Nonsense. Apeshit - Rambunctious. Batshit - Insane. Chickenshit - Cowardly. Dogshit - Very poor quality. No Shit - Obviously. Holy Shit - Mind-blowing. Hot Shit - Very good. Dipshit - A total...

Full Text: No offense, but… phrase [no 'uh-fens but] 1. Prepare to be offended. Features: Size: 7x7 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Let's circle back - phrase - 1. I'm gonna stop you right there because I have no patience for this nonsense. 2. I can't even right now. 3. I have no clue but don't want to admit it. Features: Size: 7x7 inches Made from solid knotty...

Full Text: Correct me if I'm wrong - phrase [ke' rekt me if im rong] - 1. I'm not wrong. Features: Size: 7x7 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Common Sense noun [kamen 'sens] 1. A rare form of intelligence that occurs in less than 10% of the population. 2. Turns out it's not so common. Features: Size: 7x7 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for...

Full Text: Working on my 5-Year Plan: 1-4. ?? 5. And then they'll all be sorry. Features: Size: 7x7 inches Made from solid knotty pine Flat edges for shelf-sitting Routed slot in back for hanging