Funny Signs

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways. Champagne In One Hand Chocolate In The Other Body Thoroughly Used Up,...

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways. Cigarette In One Hand Beer In The Other Body Thoroughly Used Up,...

Full Text: A Man's Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intentions Of Arriving Safely In Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways. Cigar In One Hand Beer In The Other Body Thoroughly Used Up,...

Full Text: No Solicitation No Politics No Proselytizing No Fundraisers, Except Girl Scout Cookies Welcome! Features: Size: 9x18 inches Made from solid knotty pine Beveled edges Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: I'm Only As Strong As The Girlfriends I Have, The Cocktails I Drink, And The Hairspray I Use Features: Size: 9x18 inches Made from solid knotty pine Beveled edges Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Business Hours: We Are Open: We Are Open For Business Most Days About 8:30 am. Some Days As Early As 6 Or 7, But Occasionally As Late As 12:30 Or 1, But Usually Around 9 Unless It's Later. We Are Closed: We Close At 5 Or 6, Sometimes At 4. If...

Full Text: Do Not Arouse The Wrath Of The Great And Powerful Oz. I Said Come Back Tomorrow (small) Features: Size: 9x18 inches Made from solid knotty pine Beveled edges Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways, Body Thoroughly Used Up, Totally Worn Out And Screaming, Woo Hoo, What...

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways, Chocolate In One Hand, Margarita In The Other, Body Thoroughly Used Up...

Full Text: Fishing vs. Sex: 20. No matter how much beer you've had, you can still Fish. 19. A limp rod is still useful while Fishing. 18. You don't have to hid your Fishing magazines. 17. It is perfectly acceptable to pay a professional to Fish with you...

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways, Scotch In One Hand, Cigar In The Other, Body Thoroughly Used Up,...

Full Text: Friends Are Like Underpants: Some crawl up your ass. Some snap under pressure. Some don't have the strength to hold you up. Some get a little twisted. Some support you. Some are your favorite. Some are cheap and just get bent out of shape. And...

Full Text: Man - Man is a woman's best friend. He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after a bad day. He will inspire her to do things she never thought she could do; to live without fear and forget regret. He will enable her to...

Full Text: Cowboy Words of Wisdom: Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day. Always drink upstream from the herd. Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket. Never miss a...

Full Text: If a man speaks in the middle of a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? Features: Size: 9x18 inches Made from solid knotty pine Beveled edges Routed slot in back for hanging

Full Text: Public Notice: Due to recent budget cuts, the rising cost of electricity, gas, and oil, plus the current state of the economy, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off. Have a nice day. Features: Size: 9x18 inches Made from...

Full Text: Mom's Ten Commandments: 1. Shut the doors. 2. Finish your chores. 3. Make your bed. 4. Leave unkind words unsaid. 5. Pick up your mess. 6. Be neat in your dress. 7. Thou shall not tease. 8. Say thank you and please. 9. Love one another. 10...

Full Text: Motto To Live By: Life Should Not Be A Journey To The Grave With The Intention Of Arriving Safely In An Attractive And Well Preserved Body, But Rather To Skid In Sideways, Cigar In One Hand, Whiskey In The Other, Body Throroughly Used Up...

Full Text: Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women. . . 10. You can trade and old 44 for a new 22. 9. You can keep one gun at home and have another for when you're on the road. 8. If you admire a friend's gun and tell him so, he will probably let...

Full Text: You Might Be A Nurse If. . .You've ever had a patient look you dead in the eye and say, I don't know how that got stuck there. You firmly believe that too stupid to live should be a diagnosis. You don't believe 90% of what you're told and 75%...